Do Americans See Humility as a Virtue of a Vice?
by Casey Hurley
At a town meeting
sponsored by the World Affairs Council last March,
The President did not respond to the humility
point, but he said,
“I'm not going to apologize for what I
did on the terrorist surveillance program. . .”
This exchange on CNN caused me to wonder what Americans think about humility. Do we see it as a virtue or a vice? Do we see it as a virtue in those who occupy low-status positions, and a vice in those who occupy high-status positions? How would Americans respond to a President who displayed humility?
In an earlier column I wrote that leaders’ behaviors emerge from six personal qualities, one of which is humility. So I agree with Mr. Taylor, and I remind President Bush that, since Jesus Christ is his role model, he might consider displaying more humility and less pride.
But I don’t expect the president to take my advice. Like many Americans he associates pride with strength and humility with weakness. But this is why we are confused about the virtues we want in our leaders.
Jesus was a model of humility, but Americans want proud leaders. We feel this way even though pride is the first of the seven deadly sins, and humility is the virtue against which it sins. We are confused about pride and humility because we have not resolved the contradiction between their philosophical and popular meanings.
Our dictionaries only feed the confusion. The dictionary’s second and third definitions of pride describe it as a desirable quality: “a reasonable or justifiable self-respect; delight or elation arising from some act, possession, or relationship.” So we tell our children we are proud of them. And we want them to be proud of their accomplishments.
If pride is one of the seven deadly sins, however, shouldn’t we want our children to be humble in their accomplishments?
Apparently not. Dictionaries describe humility as an undesirable quality. One says humility is, “the state of being humble,” which is “marked by meekness or modesty in behavior.” The second meaning is, “showing deferential or submissive respect.” And the third is, “low in rank, quality, or station; unpretentious or lowly.” Another dictionary says humility is recognizing one’s limitations.
These definitions illustrate the popular notions
of
humility, but they fail to explain it as a virtue -- the meaning given
by
philosophers like
It is the popular notions that cause us to believe humility is “not thinking you are good.” Or, worse yet, humility is “thinking you are not good.” These are what my parents taught, and what many well-intentioned parents teach every day.
But this is not humility. If one is truly not good at something, it is not humility to recognize it. That is reality. And if one is good at something, but believes one is not good, that is false humility.
In order to understand the true nature of humility, we need to realize that humility starts with knowing one is good. The virtue of humility is displayed by those who have special talents.
The second thing we need to understand about humility is that talented, humble people realize few others care about their accomplishments (parents are exceptions). This understanding prevents accomplished people from becoming proud.
Third, humility enables us to realize that everybody has special talents. Humble people recognize the special talents of others, instead of swelling with pride in their own accomplishments,
And the last thing that makes humility a virtue is recognizing that, in the big scheme of things, our special talents mean very little. Each of us ends up on the obituary page, regardless of whether we have written the great American novel, have become the heavyweight champion of the world, or can sing like Frank Sinatra. (For years I wanted Frank Sinatra’s talent; since he died, though, I no longer want to be like him.)
So humility is a virtue when (1) we know we are good, (2) we realize that others don’t care, (3) we recognize that everybody has talents, and (4) we know that, after we die, the world goes on.
Which quality do you want from your leaders – a sense of humility grounded in knowledge, talent and understanding, or a sense of pride that ignores fundamental truths? Each of us can choose to follow leaders who are either humble or proud, and we are responsible for that choice.