Organized activities for kids many times are mostly for parents
By Casey Hurley
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Sometimes things are not what they seem to be. For example, to passengers on a jet approaching the runway, it does not seem that flying is safer than driving. But it is common knowledge that it is, so the relative danger of flying is a myth.
This column examines a different myth - that organized youth sports are for the children. They are not.
Turning youth sports upside down exposes what is underneath, where we can see that youth sports leagues for 6- 12 year-olds are actually for adults.
This occurred to me several years ago. My 7-year-old son had a youth league game that was to start in an hour, so I went to get him from his friend's house.
He pleaded with me to let him stay and play with his friend. Of course I insisted that he go to the game.
Since then I have observed both players and adults during organized youth league activities.
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I have concluded that youth sports are for the adults, just as it was that day for me and my 7-year-old.
In order to examine this conclusion, I spoke with Professor Justin Menickelli, who studies youth sports, and who teaches
sports psychology at
As we talked, several other youth sports myths surfaced, and these help explain why the truth about youth sports goes unnoticed.
The second myth is that organized youth sports help young people develop lifelong interests and sportsmanship. Menickelli said, "The number one reason kids participate is because it is fun. The concern that should be number one is, `Are the kids having fun?' If they have fun, they will keep playing into adolescence and adulthood. If they do not have fun, they won't."
Regarding sportsmanship, Menickelli said this benefit depends on the coaches: "It is not enough to talk about good sportsmanship, coaches must model it."
Of course the sportsmanship benefit also depends on parent behavior.
My observation is that many times this benefit is lost because of angry, confrontational adults. Some parents must think their children cannot hear.
Furthermore, Menickelli said children's free play is what builds character and helps children develop: "Kids under 12 need free play as much as they need organized sports. When they play on their own, they have opportunities to be creative and to be social. Kids learn a lot about fairness, sportsmanship, cooperation and respect from free play."
Insofar as participation in youth leagues reduces opportunities for free play with other children (like it did for my 7-year-old that day), youth leagues may actually hinder the development of sportsmanship. So, are youth sports really about children developing lifelong interests and sportsmanship? I think not.
Myth three is that youth sports fight youth obesity. Menickelli pointed out, "With all these youth sports programs, our children are getting fatter. There is no evidence that these programs help kids become more fit."
But some might argue that, by their very nature, certain sports contribute to fitness. Soccer and basketball, for example, require players to run and to be agile and flexible. So, maybe this is why adults organize these activities for children.
My experience is that even soccer and basketball youth leagues have little to do with youth fitness.
During youth games and practices I often see players sitting and listening to coaches, which is time lost to becoming fit and developing skills.
Youth coaches are well intentioned, generous and dedicated people. But few of them understand what elementary school teachers know about child development.
So they don't realize that their explanations and their words of wisdom and encouragement are lost on children between 6 and 12 years of age.
If they understood more about developmentally appropriate activities for children, they would talk less and let the kids play more.
When children play among themselves, they don't get instructions about how they should play. They just play. Are youth sports really about childhood fitness? I think not.
Myth four is that youth league players learn what it takes to compete and win in life. Menickelli said, "This is ludicrous. It is a misconception that organized sports teach these things to children."
He said, "Youth sports help children learn how to be members of a team, how to take directions from adults and how to respect each other while playing. But when it comes to winning, all the research shows that, when the coach does not care about the score, the players don't care. For 6-12 year-olds, the score is overemphasized."
This is confirmed in my experience. Shortly after games are over, players have forgotten about it, and they don't care who won or lost. The same is not true for the adults.
Learning "what it takes to compete in this world" is a benefit often claimed by those whose children play on "traveling teams," where only the most skilled athletes travel and compete against the best players from other cities and regions.
Many movies have been made about this phenomenon - "The Mighty Ducks,'' "The Bad News Bears,'' etc.
This is one of our favorite stories - young people learning about life by competing on organized sports teams.
But those are movies. Real life is never like that. So, why do we keep score? Is it really to help the children learn about what it takes to compete and be a winner? I think not.
Many of my good friends are parents who promote and enjoy youth sports. These are good people, and they have the very best of intentions. My point is that their intentions are too good.
In a "SkyWriting'' magazine article entitled "Soccer- Crazy," Timothy Harper wrote, "The parents complain that they are overscheduled, but that doesn't stop them from overscheduling their children, too - while at the same time lamenting that it's too bad kids don't have a chance to just be kids" (SkyWriting, September, p. 58).
Instead of involving their children in so many activities organized by adults, parents might help their children by stepping back a little.
Many of us were children in the days when "traveling" all- star teams and high levels of competition were only for children older than 12. And parents did not attend our play sessions. We played on our own.
My final point is this is not just a youth sports issue. It is a modern American parenting issue.
In the same SkyWriting magazine, another article described a traveling children's theater company, which "has shows in more than 900 communities in all 50 states and 29 foreign countries."
These are great experiences for these children and their families, but the same questions ought to be asked about programs in which children, "were so completely focused on it (rehearsing). It was their whole lives for five days."
The producer identifies this kind of focus as "one of the secrets of the project." My interpretation is that children's theater producers know as little as athletic coaches about what is developmentally appropriate for children.
In conclusion, I am not against children joining traveling theater companies and playing in youth sports leagues, even the most competitive ones. Many good, positive things happen in these activities.
Still, these questions ought to be asked so adults can confront the myths and understand the realities.
Once we understand that these activities are for adults, we will be better able to enhance the benefits to children and limit the damage.
Casey Hurley is a professor of educational administration at